Many people close to me have illuminated the idea that every person you meet, every person you pass in the street has a sad song – a melancholy melody that makes your heart sob and your heart scream.
Due to some people’s emotional constipation, we can shut ourselves off; isolate ourselves and lock away our emotions in one of the deepest, darkest corners of our hearts. In times of sadness, weirdness or whatever ‘-ness’ emotion your limbic system graces you with, you must not build up walls around your heart because getting the bulldozer in is a lot harder than mixing the cement.
Calcifying my emotions has been something that I have always struggled with – in the past I was not particularly good at expressing the way that I feel. I regularly feel caught in some kind of emotional limbo where I am between both happiness and depression, almost as if I am floating in a sensory deprivation tank. Except this tank is my brain, and the salt water is all the chemical reactions that are my poor little feelings.
We all have a desire to save people, we all want to be seen as Superman to a particular person in our lives. We all want to be someone’s guardian angel, their saving grace or the shoulder they want to lean on at 4am. However, we must also consider how much strain being such an integral part of someone else’s emotional support can influence the projection of our emotions – it is very common for the Agony Aunt to be very stressed or unhappy themselves.
Sometimes, just sometimes, it is absolutely fine if one of the few people we manage to save throughout our lifetime is yourself.